I'm struggling.
Struggling with what to write.
Struggling with what to do.
Struggling to find balance.
"It's my day, I better make it good.
If it's not a good post no one will comment
Do I do an awesome tutorial and give away mygood ideas?
Do I self promote and point them in the direction
of my photography business, etsy store or family blog?
Do I ask them to write for my Random Acts of Kindness week?
Do I write a personal post and reveal more of who I am?"
Those thoughts are running through my mind as I write this.
And, I guess I'm sorta doing all those things.
I'm just an insecure mom of two (and one coming),
who LOVES to take photographs,
sew,
create,
laugh
and play.
But a mom who feels on a regular basis that
I'll never measure up,
I'll never get organized,
I'll never have a clean house,
I'll never cross things off my list,
I'll never play with my kids enough,
I'll never be good enough.
But you know what.
That doesn't matter.
Because I am a child of the King of Kings.
I have Jesus in my life and there's nothing else I need.
So while I'd rather be sewing something awesome,
or painting a world famous painting,
or taking the photograph of a lifetime...
I'm not.
And that's okay.
Because someday,
maybe someday,
I will.
But until that day,
I'm just gonna keep praising my Jesus
and telling people of His
unending,
undeserved,
LOVE!
So maybe next week I'll share
a recipe,
or a tutorial,
or a project...
who knows!
Maybe next week I won't be struggling.
Struggling with what to write.
Struggling with what to do.
Struggling to find balance.
"It's my day, I better make it good.
If it's not a good post no one will comment
Do I do an awesome tutorial and give away my
Do I self promote and point them in the direction
of my photography business, etsy store or family blog?
Do I ask them to write for my Random Acts of Kindness week?
Do I write a personal post and reveal more of who I am?"
Those thoughts are running through my mind as I write this.
And, I guess I'm sorta doing all those things.
I'm just an insecure mom of two (and one coming),
who LOVES to take photographs,
sew,
create,
laugh
and play.
But a mom who feels on a regular basis that
I'll never measure up,
I'll never get organized,
I'll never have a clean house,
I'll never cross things off my list,
I'll never play with my kids enough,
I'll never be good enough.
But you know what.
That doesn't matter.
Because I am a child of the King of Kings.
I have Jesus in my life and there's nothing else I need.
So while I'd rather be sewing something awesome,
or painting a world famous painting,
or taking the photograph of a lifetime...
I'm not.
And that's okay.
Because someday,
maybe someday,
I will.
But until that day,
I'm just gonna keep praising my Jesus
and telling people of His
unending,
undeserved,
LOVE!
So maybe next week I'll share
a recipe,
or a tutorial,
or a project...
who knows!
Maybe next week I won't be struggling.
I am absolutely sure you are not the only one suffering from what you've written. I know this because I feel the same way A LOT! :) It's all good. Your kids are happy and loved and you're right, you are a child of God and it is nice to know He loves you no matter what! :) ~Lanie
ReplyDeleteIn this post, you just did what a blogger does best, you shared YOURSELF. That's the best part of the blog world. So, you did a good thing being transparent, honest and reminding us all of what's most important - that God loves us as we are and created us to be just who we are. God bless you and thanks for ALL you do! ♥Laurie from Scene of the Grime
ReplyDeleteOur weakness is His strength!
ReplyDeletePraise him for our shortcomings, that bring Him glory, which you did so very well!
I think we all feel that way sometimes. It seems a lot of bloggers have posted about simplifying, and taking breaks from blogging lately. It's hard to strike a blog/family balance. I appreciate your honesty and love how so many bloggers are so open about their faith. It's inspiring and encouraging.
ReplyDeleteGod bless!
I think one of the most liberating times of my life was when I realized that there is a season and purpose for everyone and everything. We can't do it all!
ReplyDeleteIf you, and I are doing our best, God will love us all the more for it!
I believe we can all say that about ourselves at one time or another, I know I can! You said so much in that one post....said alot that others are usually only thinking. God is good, and we are blessed in so many ways. Even IF we never paint that famous painting, or travel the world, or anything other than being mom, which to me is the greatest accomplishment of all. :)
ReplyDeleteThis post was exactly what I needed to hear!! I haven't blogged besides a post of a video and some pictures in over a week because I feel very similar to what you just posted, and plus, I just don't have the time!! Thank you for sharing this and reminding us that we're all there!!
ReplyDeleteI think all the comments just go to show that we are really all not much different! Some desire to cover up the struggles but we all have them and I think we as Christians sometimes feel the need to put on a "Everything is perfect caz I know God" face- thinking we somehow have to protect him image. I am glad he came for the weak which is ME!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the honest entry!
bee blessed
mary
Okay this is word for word how I am feeling!
ReplyDeleteI could have written this blog word for word! Thanks for sharing
ReplyDeleteLovely. Simply lovely! Thanks for taking the couple of minutes and writing this. It's good to know there are fellow Christians out there too.
ReplyDeleteThanks! :)
I don't know where I would be without Jesus' love.
Amen, all those things are little compared to Christ and what he has planned for you. Jeremiah 29:11
ReplyDeleteHi Jamie - those words could have come out of my mouth today! I've been struggling this week too. But it's so nice to hear that you are as I am! And yes, He is the only thing you need!
ReplyDeletei love that you shared these feelings. you are absolutely one hundred percent not alone. i constantly feel as though i can never be good enough, never get enough done, never spend enough time.. and maybe i don't. but i look at all that i have been blessed with- my wonderful, intelligent, smart daughter and the one on the way :) and i know i am doing SOMETHING right! and you are too! <3 chin up dear!
ReplyDeleteAMEN, sister! I too am an insecure mother of two, who often dreams of a cleaner house, with laundry caught up and in its place, time to sit and play with my children for hours at a time, not to mention a better body/self image.
ReplyDeleteBut you know what,... my pastor always says if we could only see ourselves the way God sees us, we would see the real us and love ourselves so much more.
You're not the only one having these feelings and we are all here for you, during the giveaways and the down times!
I only blog when the feeling strikes me, I can't imagine having to write something every day for folks to read. I think you did a great job today.
ReplyDeleteWhen you are feeling like you will never measure up, that you have things all piled around you TO DO just ask yourself if this will matter in 50 years. You can usually weed out a lot of busyness by asking yourself that question.
Only what will last through eternity is what really matters !
Thanks for this post. I think we all feel the same way at one time or another, and it's funny to say this, but it's nice to hear someone acknowledge it! It makes me feel better, that's for sure :).
ReplyDeleteReally glad to read this today. I struggle like this a lot. A LOT. And it always makes me feel better to realize I am not the only one. So thanks.
ReplyDeleteJust like most of the other comments you received, I often feel like this too. But, although it is hard to see it at the time, when you are feeling this way, there are often great things to come! The only way from here is up...isn't that exciting!
ReplyDeleteI always feel bad about the state of our house. It's a never ending battle just to keep the kitchen tidy! But, as my parents often say, they come to visit us...not our home!
Hope you are feeling happier soon!
your post was great. it came from the heart and that makes it easier to share
ReplyDeleteJamie, you are most certainly not alone in those thoughts. I have at least one of those thoughts at least once a day (and that is counting on the low end.)
ReplyDeleteIt is so hard to try to be everything to everyone. And like you, I am thankful for the reminder that I only need to be myself for the One.
This is one of your very best posts. I love to see the real side of people...even if it's struggles and insecurities....but yet our Jesus is given the glory for who we are and what we can accomplish!!! Many precious blessings to you!!!
ReplyDeleteIn His Love....Deb
Oh, thanks for your honesty in this post. I feel the same way. It's crazy how the a blog can create so much pressure & joy at the same time. You are going to the right place for your fulfillment though & you're not alone! Thanks again!
ReplyDelete-Mandy
I'm not a mom, but I have been struggling lately too for many of the same reasons you wrote. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteLove it. Thank you for sharing your honesty. And for reminding me that I am a child of the king!
ReplyDeleteLove it. Thank you for sharing your honesty. And for reminding me that I am a child of the king!
ReplyDeletePrefer the honesty to a forced post that has no feeling behind it! *hugs* for you...Daughter of the King, Mom and Wife are your most important roles...but the truth is..none of us will have a clean enough, organized enough, perfect enough ANYTHING EVER!! But eh...it's all good ;)
ReplyDeleteOh Jamie, I'm praying for you! You are not alone in feeling these things. I feel this way sometimes too. But, like you said, Jesus' love is all around. It's amazing isn't it!!
ReplyDeleteThis is exactly what I have been struggling with lately ~ exactly. And in the scheme of things, I'm almost laughing at myself for feeling this way. At least I know I have one person who could join my camp!
ReplyDeleteSounds like you were reading my mind. I can totally relate but if all we can do is share Jesus then we have done a most excellent thing :)
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone, but you are pretty amazing and inspirational. Hope this Monday is a happy one for you.
ReplyDelete